Whoa! What happened here then? I swear every time I come to my journal its changed. Its starting to feel less and less like it belongs to me.

Anyway, I only came here to ask....

DID I MENTION I'M SPENDING EASTER IN FLORIDA???

Cannot wait, its been too long since I've seen my fiance, whom I've been engaged to for almost a year. Where does the time go?

I guess everyone will be getting Easter cards from FL and not London, sorry. xx

Not much has been going on

I find that there hasn't been too much happening for me right now, i'm just working and going to school. I don't really find much time for rest or play and so life is pretty boring right now. Which is good because sometimes drama can be stressful...but sometimes you want just a little bit of something in your life. Just to remind you that you're alive.

I haven't been too active in jland, it comes and goes. Most of the time I just find myself lying in bed reading entries. But since i'm lying down I don't comment, just read. I've noticed that a lot of people have packed up and left or taken breaks. I suppose it happens for different reasons but again, it just depends who you're journaling to. When I write, I'm writing to you guys (whoever may or may not be reading) but I write whatevers on my mind, not necessarily something that folks would like to read. I'm just not the kind of person who'll have double digit comments and there's no way i'd be able to read that many journals!

Sunday was mothers day over here, I got my mum a new watch for when she goes out. She got a book, chocolates and flowers and I think she was pretty happy. She got a nice "happy mothers day grandma" card from Nathan and Chanae. For the longest time my mum was looking forward to being a grandma, my brothers waited until their late twenties to have kiddies. And I'm sure she's waiting for my sister and I...well, maybe not so much my sister but maybe me. But like I tell Adam the time is not right now, there will be a lot more waiting going on. I do look forward to having children one day but its life changing and so that one day isn't any day soon. I did watch a programme the other day talking about motherhood and it successfully put me off a few more years when the women were talking about tearing!? OUCH! and said they waited months before their sex lives got back to anything almost normal. It didn't make me feel much better when Adam said that sex afterwards would be like throwing a hotdog down a hallway, have to love his sense of humour. I guess I won't be celebrating mothers day for a while.

Things are good between Adam and I. I'm still surprised by the ways I love him, does that sound mean? cause its not meant to.  I just mean, i'm sometimes overwhelmed by how much he really means to me. how much a person can love another person. care for another person. on a day to day basis, yes I say it but I don't necessarily feel it in that all powerful way. but sometimes we'll be talking about something or we'll think about something and i'll get hit by that truck of love. i dont know, i dont think i'm explaining myself very well. hopefully, i'll be visiting for Easter and then once i'm gone he'll send in his visa application. When that happens I think i'll be sitting with everything crossed!

Well, i'm gonna get ready for class today. When I get home i've a recording of America's Next Top Model to watch. I love it. And I'm also watching Big Brother: til death do us part. I'm really a fan of American reality shows, I dont watch the British ones. Oh and of course, American Idol. And i've been watching Bad Girls club on the Oxygen website. I'm a reality show junkie. Everytime I'm watching the hills my brother walks in and tells me its not real and we get into an argument about it, its quite sad but amusing.

My little brother (I say little but he recently turned 13, he is officially a teenager) has gone away on a school trip. They took 15 kids from his year who are doing really well in school as a treat. He's in the top classes for all his subjects and the teachers are really impressed with is work and attitude so we're all really proud of him. I'm liking being able to watch whatever I want without him interupting, but I miss him. Sssh! Don't tell!