I find myself with so much to think about now that we enter a new year. Mostly about mistakes I've made and things I didn't do right. Changes I want to make, to myself, for myself. And for my future with Adam.
I don't know if I feel like I'm living life, most days I just feel like I'm existing. Going through the day by day routines but getting very little pleasure out of life. I think that's the difference between living and existing, whether or not you're happy with life and get any pleasure out of the things you do. There are things that I do occasionally that bring me joy, like spending the day with my nieces and nephews or having dinner and drinks with friends. Of course spending time with Adam brings be joy, he is my love. But my job, doesn't bring be any joy. Any pleasure. Any level of purpose or fulfilment. And I feel I need more direction in this area of my life. What career path do I want to choose, because at this point in my life I still have time to choose but it has to be the right choice.
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