Kill Your Babies.

When you're in a long distance relationship you get good at things that some couples struggle to figure out. Like how to argue. 
Of course, everybody wants a perfect relationship where you never fight or fall out but that isn't reality. Adam and I did go a pretty long time without fighting but eventually the time comes when you disagree or you're just feeling crabby or you actively look for a fight. 

Yes, there have been days when I've just been looking for a fight. What can I say, hormones?

But we always get to realising that there is no way on earth that we can say goodnight mad at each other. Sure we've hung up the phone in annoyance but someone always calls right back. And we're actually pretty polite about it, letting each other have their turn. I sometimes keep notes so I can remember what he said and tell him just how ridiculously wrong he is when its my turn to talk.

But the best thing about being in a long distance relationship is that you get to talk. I love to talk, I'm a Gemini and we're all about communication. The husbandly one is more the dark, broody, strong and silent type. In fact, sometimes I feel closer to him, emotionally, when we're apart than when we're together. On the phone he's more inclined to sit and reminisce with me over fun times we've had together. And one of my favourite things to do is talk about when we met, how we felt about each other. So whenever he tells me again about those first flitters of love that we shared, I melt...and then of course, I wish I could have a hug but that's one of the downsides to being in a long distance relationship. There are many downsides.

We first met online when we were both a few months away from turning nineteen. At the time, I wasn't looking for a relationship and I certainly didn't think that I would have one with someone on the other side of the planet. Around that time I had, had about three unsuccessful dating experiences and I just figured that when the right person came along I would know. I would want to open my heart to them and make myself vulnerable. Well, I found that pretty quickly with Adam.

Even though we're still stuck doing the long distance thing (for the meantime anyway), I am so proud of us that we've managed to stay together as a young couple who didn't know how or when or if we would be together again. Most people change a lot between the ages of 18 and 25 and I think that despite the distance we've been able to change together. Or to at least learn to accept the changes that the other has made...that said, Adam is still secretly hoping that I'll come out of the closet as a Tea Party Member and leave behind my Liberal ideals. If it hasn't happened yet, I don't see it happening.

Perhaps this is the liberal inside of me or the young feminist I put away years ago but I was shocked to learn that the US government doesn't provide contraception for free. Obviously, they do in England. I pay for my other prescriptions but I don't pay for my contraceptive. As an adult, its not that I can't. I can. I have a job and I think at this age, its my responsibility to ensure that I don't have an unwanted pregnancy. If they wanted to charge me, I wouldn't complain.

I don't however, think that a girl of sixteen, eighteen, even twenty-one is necessarily in a position where they can provide their own contraceptive. Or even be aware of the variety of products and the different ways they need to be protected.

There are people who are opposed to free contraception for a variety of reasons. Perhaps the cost would be too great in a struggling economy. Please bare in mind the costs of treating someone who contracts HIV because they didn't know to or have a condom to use. Please bare in mind the cost of the state having to raise a child that was unwanted. Yes there is such a thing as adoption, yet there are still thousands of children across the country waiting to be adopted.

Other people are opposed to free contraception on religious grounds. These people also tend to be those who don't believe in abortion. For them it is simple. Sex should only occur in marriage. And why would you want to use contraception when you're married? And why wouldn't you want to keep your baby when you're married? 


Unfortunately, we don't live in a perfect world. People do not confine sex to marriage...who says they should? Young girls aren't correctly educated on how sexual infections are spread and how easily pregnancy can occur. One of my favourite reality shows Teen Mom is clear evidence of that. I think growing up, I was pretty lucky, in that my mother explained all about the birds and the bees to me. Which was a good thing because in Catholic school, they only teach abstinence. By the time I finished high school I knew of two girls who had abortions. 

My opinion is simple. Contraception should be provided for free, for all girls aged sixteen to twenty-five. And this information should be confidential. Perhaps parents of young girls will disagree with me and dislike the fact that their daughter can get condoms or the pill without them knowing. I say, better that than a baby. I would however like to know the opinions of those of you who made it all the way to the bottom of this long entry! lol!


In response to my last blog post: I'm going to be moving to Knoxville, TN. Adam parents moved up there a couple years back so I've never been. I'm a little bit anxious about being in a new place, I'm not at all an outdoor girl (though the clothes look fun) having lived in a city my whole life. But I am trying to look at it as an adventure and I'm going out there with an open mind. If I can't stand the mountains...and Adam clearly can't stand the city...we'll have to search for somewhere in between.
Also, I am just realising that I have NO idea how I'm gonna get my contraceptive pill when I move. Can I just buy it at the pharmacy or do I need a doctor to write a script? Can it be any old doctor or a gyno?